_j4s0n?**

Much to do

2006-08-30T19:37:00.000-07:00

TextedThought of the day

waah..so busy..when i started blogging again, i didn't expect my schedule to be so tight..but, trying my best

too many things to talk about, i'll text 'em in point form..(lol)

_just came back from 5days and 4nights in Kota Kinabalu, beautiful place.._went up one night in KK town, went up to the foothill of Mt. Kinabalu, a place called Kundasang.(Temperature was like Cameron Highlands). Stayed there for 3days and 2nights._came down to KK town for 1night, next day went to Manukan Island..(got a really cool tan, and a really bad burn)..then flew home at night, reached home at midnight._went to school to realise that in the 3school days that i missed, there wasn't THAT much extra work..the only thing i kinda missed was the time (5 days) that everyone else had to finish up their homework.._thank God that tmr is a public holiday,i have the whole day to finish up as much work as possible.._feeling kinda stressed up coz i have ALOT to do..but praise the Lord for His mercy endures forever..i know He'd see me through..now, i'm just taking my homework all one step at a time..hallelujah

His love never fails.

There must be more that this

2006-08-18T09:50:00.000-07:00

1st week into Semester 2 of my foundation course..

i got a B for the Sem 1, Praise God!

Alot of feelings and emotions going on right now..not really in the mood of blogging...Long hours coming back again..slept at 5:30 on wednesday night and 3 last night..don't know about tonight, its 12:50..times are tough, workload is increasing, and the expectancy is greater..
there must be more than this..

i see a rough weekend ahead.
need to go back to school to finish printing my t-shirts, then need to go off to church for Song practice, then at night we have a friend's surprise party, Sunday is the full day..
God save my soul.

Lord my heart and soul cries out to You, how i long for your purpose in my life, how i long to see the bigger picture in these things im going through, lest i loose focus and stray away...how i long to walk with you like Enoch did, but i stumble everytime i say that..how i long for your peace, the peace that surpasses all understanding, for the Your joy that will be my strength to carry on..
Lord Lord, my life is not my own..

in a way, i thank You Lord that i'm seeing this early in the Sem..and i know that there is more that this...

(talking here won't do much good...going off to talk to Him)

Revelation

2006-08-11T22:29:00.000-07:00

praise the Lord!

Last night we were having cell group at my house and i was casting my God-given vision to the group. The whole thing was good and the vision had a good response from the group. I really want to thank Him, coz last night was one of those nights when everything that I wanted to say, everything that was in my heart, was spoken with such ease and everything came out the way i wanted it to; the way He'd wanted it to.

The vision that i have for the cell is that we would experience Growth, in a few areas:
1. Our Worship
2. Our Preaching
3. Our Fellowship: both inward and outward

We can sum our vision up to "Love God, and Love People".

So, naturally, Cell Leader Jacklyn stirs the group up to discuss about ways we can 'sell' our cell, to make our cell group appealing and attractive to our peers. But i was already having some thoughts about this.
I kinda thank God that i was the first to respond..i said, that if Jesus is lifted up, He will draw all men to Himself (John 12:32)
And this is when the revelation came..i said that the harvest is plentiful, but the labourers are few (Matt 9:37)..then i realized what i had just said..it was a divine revelation indeed, that it is the Labourers that bring the harvest in..the Bible didn't say, the harvest is plentiful, but exciting activities are few, or attractive events are few..but it is the Labourers that eventually bring the harvest in..
That just plainly confirms what we have been saying all this while..It was also confirmed by Ps Clement Wong in Youth Pastors' School during his first session.

indeed, it is the Labourers..

Hallelujah for all He is!

Youth Pastor's School

2006-08-10T06:34:00.000-07:00

the touch of God is always refreshing..

just came down from Awana Genting from Youth Pastor's School organized by Youth Alive Malaysia and indeed, it was good to be touched by God. Because i was relatively younger and inexperienced, compared to my older friends, i learned alot through the sessions, whereas for my friends, it was more of a reminder. But during the camp, the thing that touched me the most was when God spoke to me through one of the the Youth Alive committee pastors, Ps. Lisa Chin..to be honest, there was alot that God spoke, but i couldnt remember them enough to write them down, and so, it was more 'for the moment'...i've also, by God's grace and mercy, been realizing things that i have been doing all this while and God is beginning to stir me up into a person that questions things that are going on. For example, to question our our routines in church, to question the things we so clichely say in our prayers, basically to re-evaluate everything to find its true purpose again.

i think, the most important thing when you return from a camp, or a conference, or an event is what we actually do with what we've just learned. And for me, my action plans are many..there are some for me personally and some for my cell group..(don't have the time to write them all down here, and i don't think you'd want to read ALL of them either..but i might write some of them along the way).

God is truly faithful, and i went for this camp looking to be refreshed and to be revived, and by God's grace, i was...

praise Him.

Why I'm blogging again

2006-08-04T11:58:00.000-07:00

A picture paints a thousand words...

...but i haven't got my thousand words to paint my picture.

I've learned that if i can speak my thoughts, it would go to show that i know what i'm thinking...
Bringing that to a new level, if i can write my thoughts, it would go beyond speaking it, more effort put in, thus, learning to ultimately say what i mean and to mean what i say.

Being Nice

2006-08-04T10:18:00.000-07:00

TextedThought of the day..
Politeness sumtimes makes the whole difference.
I went around the Bintang Walk, Lowyat, Times Square area today, distributing GoAcademy's open day flyers..the thing was, everywhere i went, i was sumhow told by the place's management that i wasn't supposed to give flyers out just like that. Well, out of the 4 times i was told, 2 of them gave me a good impression and i was glad to obey..the other 2 on the other hand (not mentioning locations)..one of them was the place's guard..he just told me, "Tak boleh.."..completely understanding what he meant, i went on my way..The other place, the guy was pretty rude, asked me, "Who gave you the permission to give out these things?"...(i need you guys to pause here a while..just think..if i didn't have the permission, would i know WHO gave me that 'permission'?..you see, the management DOESN'T give permission to ppl like me to distribute flyers..so why bother asking me, WHO gave me the permission?..)

These kinda things, if said politely and nicely would make the whole difference..
Continuing my story, i told him that i didn't know that i couldn't do what i was doin..(which i really didnt)..He then asked me to follow him and he said, "I'll teach you HOW to know"..i was honestly thinking he was bringing me to the management's office, where i could get proper permission and what not..instead, he brought me to the Security Surveillance Camera room and asked the security lady there to get show the camera footage of me distributing flyers..he was like "Camera, camera...Ground floor..escalator.."..but thank God he passed me to another gut that was much nicer and i would say was more professional about it..he asked me where i was from and what i was doing, and after i explained, he let me go asking me not to do it again..very nicely done, and at the end of it, i was glad to apologize and i left with a good feeling..
Again i say, these small things, the way we address situations and when we speak to people, politeness and a smile goes a long way..thanks to those 2 ppl that were nice enough to explain that their company's policy is such that flyer distribution was prohibited, i'm not discouraged..

i'm bald?..i'm bald??....I'M BALD!!!...ARGHH!!!

2005-07-20T18:33:00.001-07:00

Ladies and gentlemen...

IM BALD!!!...

this was what happened..
i went to the barber yesterday to get a haircut...(yes..i needed a haircut..don't ask!)
so, i told the barber..no.2 ...which is the number of the shaver length i wanted..all this while i've cut my hair no.2...he was and indian man..and so, i spoke to him in Malay..considering EVERYONE understands Malay in MALAYsia..

so, he cut my hair with the no.2 shaver length at first..and it turned out really really good...exactly the way i had wanted it to turn out..

after cutting it no.2 ..he then used the brush to brush the rest of the hair off my head...then he picked up the spray and sprayed some water onto my head...i thought he was washing the rest of te hair off..he sprayed quite alot of water..so..i thought he was doing a pretty good job with washing my head and all that and so,i didn't say anything..

i was actually gonna ask him to give me a clean razor cut at my sideburns and at the back..but he picked up a blade even before i told him about it...

so, he took the blade and started shaving....MY HEAD!!..he was shaving my head for a while until i realised that he wasn't doing any trimming like i thought..or anything like that....HE WAS GIVING ME A SHAVE!!..

by the time i realised, it was too late..there was already a patch on my head..i saw void on my head..i saw my friggin scalp!!...

and there you go ladies and gentlemen..that's how i got bald...this is really a nightmare to me..but i was praying and asking God about this...and i figured...i'm gonna make the best out of situation...

(Ooo..check out what i'm about to say..)

_got hair?*~*

had a gr8 time

2005-07-18T23:37:00.000-07:00

last friday,
i had cell and i got joseph to come along..and he brought his cell..
but they got lost and arrived very late..after we had finished everything..so, we went for a drink..his cell and i...

and i slept over at his place in KL so that i could go to church early the next morning..
see,the sunday before that..i was told by my youth leader..(joash)..that Canaan Church..(a small church that we were close to)..was having an event and our church was invited to come..and we were also asked to lead the worship for that day..so,my youth leader asked me to be in charge of it and so i was...so the practice was at 9:30am Saturday...in church..and see i live in Subang Jaya which is say 30 mins from church..so i decided i'd sleep at a friend's place so we won't have to wake up so early..
and that's why i was at joseph's..

got wacky the night before...got a bit of sleep..and went to church the next morning for practice..after practice..was prayer and after that..sunda service practice...and then we went to Canaan Church

so, at Canaan Church...i personally had a good time..(although i didn't understand the pastor coz he was speaking in Mandarin)..and also apart from the reason that there were a few girls in the picture..(ahem ahem..)...i had a good time leading the congregation into a time of worship..

and that leads me to the core of this blog..

sometimes as worship leader..we can get really affected by the paticipation of the congregation..
when we get all worked up and they gt worked up about praising God..we're happy!..but when we put ourselves in the position of uncertainty and when we expose ourselves to criticism...what the crowd does is vey very vital to us..
they can either break us or the can really make us..

and when i was leading at Canaan..the crowd could've broken me...BIG time..
i thought my own youth was unsupportive...( i was wrong..)

but then again..it could be because they weren't used to it..(not to judge!)

and so,there i was,in that position of near collapse..that i just called out to God and i realised that i wasn't supposed to 'perform'..i was leading worship..and to God, the only thing that mattered was if I was worshipping Him..
it didn't matter if the crowd sang along as loud as i did..or jump as much as i did..
the ONLY thing that mattered to God was if I myself was worshipping Him with all my heart and with everything in me..

so to those of you out there that are worhip leaders or are going to lead worship anytime soon..remember this...God only looks at your attitude and your heart when you lead..and as much as He is concerned..He only wants you to give your all to Him..not affected by your surroundings and how people will think of ou and look at you..so, be not discouraged!..

_got worship?*~

easy??...you say its easy??

2005-07-10T23:22:00.000-07:00

just got back from school...its a monday, and everyone knows how that feels...juuust greeeat rite??(yea right)..

but anyway...morning started of good..had a pretty funny assembly..joking around and stuff..not too bad la actually..

then it happened..
ok, if you study in my school or anywhere near it..you should know that my school's CF presidents have the patience of....of....erm...a super patient person!

why is that so?..
we have a close-to-perfect CF teacher...trust me...all you need is to BE in the same room as her..and you'll know what i mean.
im not gonna talk about her because...no.1_that'll be gossiping... and no.2_i told you ..she's perfect..nothing bad to talk about...all she does is GOOD!...

so, i told you that to tell you this..
i was called to get involved in my school'd cf in 2003...so i started getting myself involved with the club..and being the kinda person i am...before i knew it, i started picing up responsibilities...dont get me wrong..i DID have a heart for my CF..ii cared for the cf because i belive God has placed in me a burden to do sumting about it..and i did..that was when i was in form 3..then form 4 came and i was elected to be the vice president of the club..i was realy glad that i could take up such a pose..so, a year of ups and downs passed..sweat and stress...working with my beloved president..Sarah..and all that..so, another year passed..and i was elected to be the president this time..

so, here i am now...the president of my school's CF

lemme tell you another story...
just yesterday..our youth meeting in church had this group discussion thingy and we separated to groups that we wanted to get imnvolved in...groups like children ministry...feed the poor ministry..and there was one..Christian Fellowship ministry...

so,i look at them and all the advicei have for you is to never give up and stay teachable!

i told you that story to tell you this story..
today, i 'bumped' into my cf teacher..and she sorta like scolded me for sum things that i forgot to do..she was sorta like giving me a lecture that..haih..well..i sorta deserved...
you know..most of the time..other days, i'd be able to take it and i'd go away ok..but this time...i was just affected by her..i couldnt concentrate with anything anymore..i just couldn't...

well..this is my case guys..but i wanna say to all you guys who have a heart for your CF..
never give up..because..alot of things will definitely come in your way...and sumtimes they can just make you lose faith with everything and you feel like giving up!..but dont!..hang in there...for me.things have been going pretty tough....pretty tough if you ask my committee and my frens..they know what i mean..so,

secondly..be teachable..you can never steer your cf alone!...ppl will come in your way and just rub you the wrong way..but most of the time they are doing it because they care too..so, they will start telling you how you should run your cf and for my case..its my cf taeacher lah...so, stay teachable and try your best to learn what3ver there is to learn...

take it from me..i know what its like!

until then...keep that fire burning!

_got guts?**

physical?..or spiritual?

2005-07-05T23:24:00.000-07:00

what's with my title?

while writing this..im actually having a fever..which is funny, because it was just yesterday that i was reading sumthing about this.

isnt it funny that everytime we try to take time out to focus and concentrate on God..its ok the first few times..then after a while..we start to get distracted..we either get too tired or our mind just won't stay still...we'll start thinking about other things..like what we're gonna be eating for breakfast..which shirt to wear to work...sound familiar?

has it ever struck you that it could be the devil that's influencing your thoughts?
sounds weird doesnt it?...lemme tell you my story

these past few months have been very very victorious months for me..ive had sum really extreme spiritual growth..ive been seeing myself doing things that i could only dream of doing..its really gong very well with me..

and the devil hates that!

i was just reading about this yesterday..and im now sick..
well for those of you guys who know me..im not really the kinda guy who easily falls sick..but now i am...

try hard not to shut this possibility..because the devil is good at reasoning with our logic..and when you have doubts about these kinda things...its usualy becuase of spiritual attack..

to tell you the truth.if i could, i wouldve wrote a much longer blog about this issue..but, you see..im sick...(thats his whole idea and motive..)

i'll try my best to continue to talk about this tmr..until then..
keep fighting the good fight of faith!

h1s fRe4k!

jason

mamak?**

2005-07-04T23:18:00.000-07:00

for those of you guys who know about my situation with a special sum one ..you should know that things happened and i wasnt in the best condition..

so,i was thinking about sum idea i had that i can do to sorta fix things between us lah..so i thought i'd have like a chat with my old man..you know..to talk and sorta like tell him my situation lah..we actually du do much of that..but i figured that at the end of the day..i'll still have to come back to my own folks for permission and stuff like that..

ok..if you're stil in the blue about what im talking about...im talking about Dionne...

so..i decided to get out of my comfort zone and placed myself vulnerable to my dad by telling him what has been going on and my feelings towards her and all that...
so, he was actually very very open to me telling him all these stuff..he wasnt giving me any look or giving any impression that i was doing sumthing very dumb or anything like that actually..

to cut the story short..we had one of our best times ever!..i started off the conversation by talking about me..and then,he gave me sum advice and told me what he thought about the whole BGR thingy going on...and then he continued to talk about life....and what he had to go through in life until today..and he explained to me about the importance of our walk with God and all that..so, we really really had a very good time..and before we knew it..we had been talking for about 2 and a halkf or 3 hours...ended around 1:30 in the morning...

i really thank God for giving us the opportunity to share our lives with each other in such a priceless way...

i love you dad!..and most importantly..i love u Dad!

_got love?*~

28

2005-06-28T18:28:00.000-07:00

woohoo!!

look to you

2005-06-12T23:33:00.000-07:00

UNITED_LOOK TO YOU

one heck of an awesome album guys!
just sorta got a copy of it yesterday..(a pirated one)...really feel wrong about he whole pirated idea..but had to do it anyway, gonna song lead on sunday and my co-songleader wants to play a song from the album..so i needed to check it out..

dont listen to me tell you how good the album is..check it out yourselves..
and GET THE ORIGINAL!!..the original one comes with a bonus VCD with behind the scenes clips and songs and stuff

this album is really a good one i have to say..all 13 tracks have a sorta depth that i think is really necessary in songs of worship and praise to God

im not endorsing the album or anything but its a good source for inspiration(..to songwriters out there..)..its good stuff

_cheers y'all!

_j4s0n

bloggin?

2005-06-09T23:22:00.000-07:00

i noe bloging is a thing of the past..but i have a few friends that are just starting to blog and they are somewhat hooked to the whole concept of web jounalling...

anyway, its cool..and im getting into it myself too

have you ever wondered..why do ppl get bored of reading other ppl's blogs after a while?
thats because..ppl usually blog about their day..their work and all that..but i have come to realize..that it doesnt seem to bore me everytime i read blogs about God!

i think the whole reason we can be less bored when reading blogs about God is because He never sticks to a constant pattern that we can get bored and tired of...whereas our everyday life?..how different can things get...day in day out..doing the same sorta things

wanna get your blogs read...blog about God!haha!..(you know what i mean)

my point is..
its much more easier to look at a higher and greater force and feel good about it than to look at each other and see the faults in each other and feel discouraged about it..

check out these blogs and You'll know what i mean>>

_silverangel's blog

_Ps. Luke's blog

_my youth leader's blOg

enjoy!

_j4s0n
**made2glrfy my fathr**

im trully grateful..

2005-06-09T00:03:00.000-07:00

just last night...i had one of the best phone conversations with my fren..dionne
she has a blog to..can check her out.. http://dionney28.blogspot.com

had like one of the best conversations ever man..couldnt have asked for anything more..ohh..one of the longest ones too..sumthing like 1h 45 mins?...going to get slaughtered man..
but i dont do this all the time lah..so..i guess its like...do once long long...and then for a long time dont do it again.haha

but seriously lah..i really thank God for giving me the grace that i would never deserve...
all this while..ive just got the pieces of a puzzle...and now..He's beginning to show me the pieces coming together..and this friendship and we're having is really coming together..one of the best people that could be your friends!..(cheers di!)

its really cool..im trully..trully grateful!
(thank You Lord)

_j4s0n

_gR8ful?**

one thing i've learned

2005-06-08T23:27:00.000-07:00

just came back from Pyramid..

the plan was actually to meet up with a couple of other friends..it was like sum kinda post CF Rally gathering..the 1st and 2nd worship session team members punya gathering thingy lah

ended up only 4 of us could make it..they told me it was at 11..
so..i went at 11+, and i called them and they werent there yet...so i waited for them lah..while waiting..i walked around in pyramid...all alone

this was when i learned..that no matter what you do..its always nicer to do it with sumone..well, that was the time when i could go window shopping with God..haha( i wasnt really alone lah..was talking to Him about stuff..)

its always nicer to do things with sumone else!...

_j4s0n
*but im not alone...*

ladies and gentlemen...92%!!

2005-06-08T03:32:00.000-07:00

woohoo..i aced my undang test man...as you guys would say it...i OWNED!!haha

i got a 46/50..thats 92% man..how often do you get these kinda marks one..haha

the most incredible part of this whole thing is..
see, im have a mild case of colourblindness...its a red-green type defect lah...so there are 8 colour questions that i have to get full marks for...so, i sorta tried to memorize a few..( you know what i mean)..
but most of the ones that i memorized..didnt come out...only one did
its really surprising that all the ones that i didnt memorize came out..but i could see them..haha isnt that a miracle?

so..thats why im so happy...passing the colourblind test itself to me was like passing the whole exam already...

but then, cannot lah rite...
so there was the 50 objective questions thing...got pretty stressed up doin, coz there were sum that were just complicating..and i didnt remember the answers to them...(if youve been through it..you'd know what i mean)...
so anyway...i got through it and i passed..even higher than my 2 friends that took the test along with me..haha...see, i didnt really do any revision..kinda went there slightly unprepared..but well..92 ladies and gentlemen...92!

peace to y'all..haha

_j4s0n..

yo yo yo

2005-06-06T04:32:00.000-07:00

this is sooo not me to blog guys!

just joined for the sake of joining...haha
nolah..i just made this new fren and he's a blogger...big time blogger
so.i sorta joined so that i can comment on his blogs and all that..haha

ok..there you go, my first blog ladies and gentlemen!

by the way..visit http://effectionist.deviantart.com